AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I think you just described to us the most perfect drunken fairy tale that has somehow never been written
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
