how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
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