Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
My liver just broke up with me...
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
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