**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
What am I supposed to say? "Oh hey, I can't go out with you tonight because I can't picture myself sleeping with you and I was high and just trying to be nice when I said yes"?
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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