quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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