Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Randomize
