So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
