I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
