Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
My vagina is very pro this idea
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
