Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
Just woke up wearing a top hat and simpsons boxers. i also found more money in my wallet then what i had before going out, about $1000 more
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
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