I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
still drunk.please come get me.he kicked me out because i couldn't stop laughing about passing out in the middle of taking his virginity.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
