am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
kyle and i were puking, simultaneously, off the front porch at 4 am, and in the middle of it he looks up, reaches his hand over, and says "knucks." And then I proceeded to fist bump him. By farrr the best time I've ever had puking.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
