I'm not unpopping my collar. This shirt is too expensive to crease.
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
