dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
