goodnight i made you a song goodbye
True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
