That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.
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