And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I'm laying in bed cuddling with my teddy bear and eating waffles. I need a fucking boyfriend
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
Randomize