Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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