His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
