at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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