Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Randomize
