I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
This is the high leading the old right now
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
