Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I'll be the Broncos and you be the Seahawks and you can pound the shit out of me.
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
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