well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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