Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
Are we still banned from the library?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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