i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
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