It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
I should probably file for unemployment. Sometime between last night and 4 AM I facebooked my manager the lyrics to hoe by ludacris. I'm just projecting ahead here.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
The convent might be a nice break from real life
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
