let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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