dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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