we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
This is the high leading the old right now
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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