also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
