But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
So squirting runs in the family.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
