That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
