My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
