I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
they need to just BURY HIM!
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
"can you come pick me up from the ikea parking garage i think i slept here"
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
