suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Sorry I couldn't make it...got a scrambled voicemail, all I heard was "Bring the dildo"
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
