i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Randomize
