What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
how am i supposed to spank it to a shakira video when she looks like she is doing the robot?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Welcome to texting with Mike. You're now leaving the sober section and headed to our insanely high bad decision making portion of mike. Enjoy the trip.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
