So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
It was going very smoothly until she noticed my boner of hope.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
