Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
