I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
Randomize
