I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Life is when you're laying naked in bed, eating Double Stuff Oreos with your boyfriend, blazed as fuck. Happy 4/20.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Randomize
