Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
