She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
Randomize
