So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
