I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
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