I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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