Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Sorry about my life...
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
