All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
If you don't remember anything tomorrow, this is to remind you that you asked me in secret to build a bobsled with you and re-enact Cool Runnings.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
