Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
Randomize